Aug. 1, 2006
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Tradeoffs...........While you CAN have it all..you can't have it all at ONCE!
Every choice you make involves giving up something else. I love Debbie Ford's book, The Right Questions. My favorite is, "Will this choice propel me to an inspiring future, or keep me stuck in the past?" Lately, in different ways, many of my coaching clients, seem to be struggling with the guilt and angst of what their choices have forced them to give up. Each day can be focused on what we trade off, along with the worry that maybe we didn't make the right choice or guilt because someone else thinks we should be spending our time differently OR it can be focused on owning the choice we have made and being EXTRAordinary because of it.
This 3 week trip through the northwest states of our amazing country that Bub and Lily and I are on has been a wonderfully fun (oh, yes, and there have been some of THOSE moments! after all, she is 4!) experience. All of the generous friends, the sites and experiences have made memories of a lifetime (and Lily is recording each day in a journal!) My wonderfully clients are putting up with missed appointments and some of my projects are being woefully put on the back burner. I've had moments when my old perfectionist self has chastised me for not getting every email answered, not doing introductory sessions from the road, and not even blogging about the trip! I know, though, that the rest of the world can wait and the choice I've made to fully give over to enjoying the world through the eyes of this 4 year old and the love of my life is the perfect one. It was the ultimate compliment when Lily spontaneously said to me the other night,"you are an interesting woman, Grandma!" I'm not sure what meaning she attaches to that word or what I had done to generate the thought, but I will die happy knowing my grandchild found me interesting.
As my latent perfectionism reminds me, the tradeoffs are always there . I also know that second guessing and wasted guilt only drain energy that could be embracing the passion. Those jump in with both feet and leave behind the safety of the ordinariness give us role models.
It's hard:
- Being an accomplished business woman with children but this woman is modeling for her children behavior that will instill courage in them.
- Being a committed volunteer leader who owns a business but this woman is modeling the ability to make inspired choices and give others the message they can to do the same.
- Being an entrepreneur building a business before it has generated financial income when others think perhaps you should just work at a job with a paycheck, but this woman is modeling pushing through from the safety to a place of living with passion.
- Being a successful woman with a good business who decides her passions are elsewhere, but this woman models the fact she can do the risky and unknown if she trusts her inner voice to guide her to the right choice.
It's easy to succumb to the "shoulds" that we impose on ourselves and to listen to the "it can't be done" chatter that others are all too happy to share. It is not so easy to go for your dreams, to use your passion to decide what is really going to give you a day or week or month or year of feeling blissfully engaged in life and to be able to understand, yes, you could take another road, but it would not be you living as fully engaged in the life YOU were meant to lead. But, I have found, as I begin to understand the tradeoffs are part of the deal and I can be at peace with it.
Thoughts for this Tuesday:
- What choice are you putting off because of the fear of what you have to give up? Are you ready to become courageous?
- What guilt is plaguing you about a choice you have already made, that needs to be silenced?
- Where can you let go of the need to be perfect and enjoy delighting yourself?
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Please Help Me Make a Difference....
For a $10 (or more) donation, you description of how this woman inspired you will inspire the rest o f, be a great tribute and thank you to her and help The Web Women's Giving Circle raise the HUGE goal of $100,000 that we will raise by December for the CARE More Challenge, empowering impoverished women.
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Thank you in for the difference you are making in the world whether it be by supporting me or by the other places you are making a difference and modeling for others the extraordinary!
You may think this is generic-not applying to you...but it is NOT...I am blessed that the people who are part of my community of readers are amazing people each and every one!
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