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I was thinking about our first relocation the other morning while I was at the gym - doing ab crunches, which I hate. Guess I needed something to get my mind off of what I was doing.

But what I was thinking about was much harder than a hundred ab crunches.

Our first relo was from Detroit, MI to Boston, MA. We had two children (3 and 2), I was in graduate school and working, and my wife was working for General Motors (at that time everyone in MI either worked for one of the big automakers or a related industry. We were interested in going to Boston and she had an opportunity for a new job there. So the decision was made.

Because of grad school, and her job, my wife went off to Boston to start work and lived in a hotel for 3 months. I stayed in Dearborn Height with the kids, and continued grad school and working. We got to visit a couple of times during this period, meeting midway in New York. This was one of the hardest things I have ever done - and it was especially hard for the girls not having their mother around.  And I know it was so hard for my wife to not be home with her girls. Talking on the phone daily helped, but it's just not the same. I was also starting my job hunt in Boston since I was at a point with grad school when I could live elsewhere and finish my research. Fortunately some of my wife's family a couple of hours away so periodic visits helped.

My wife started house hunting and plans were made to put our first house in MI on the market. Busy times, for sure. Our house didn't sell right away but off to Boston I went with the kids. We moved into a rental apartment for a couple of months while we waited for the Michigan house to sell (tough market back then) and to close on our new home in Boston. Because of the rental most of our furniture and personal stuff remained in storage.

This was a really tough emotional, and physically draining, experience for everyone, but it all worked out...finally (took about 5 months). We moved into our new home outside Boston, I started a new job and continued to work on finishing my degree (which meant a monthly trip from Boston to Detroit...by car [15 hours each way] since money was not abundant in those days), the kids started pre-school down the street, my wife settled more into her job and life moved on.

Going through relocation yourself? I know what it's like. Guess those ab crunches weren't so bad after all.

Selling your home when you are planning to relocate isn't really too different, and my intent here is NOT to counsel on the methods you should employ (maybe later) but to emphasize some issues that you should be aware of given you are relocating (not down the street but far away, say hundreds of miles or more).

1. Get it sold before you move, and before you buy another house, if at all possible. This is particularly important in most markets today since homes are sitting on the market much longer. If you commit to another house but yours doesn't sell, and you NEED to be in your new home for work, etc., you are in a pickle. Plus you have to qualify for that new mortgage and may not if you have a home you need to sell.

2. Be conservative in your pricing. This is even more important with a relo because you cannot afford to not have the house sell, in most cases, and we all know there is a lot of competition. Since you need to make a clean break and move on, get the place sold. Holding out for a few thousand dollars (only a possibility) does not make sense. And if you NEED to make a certain net on your house you could be in a tight spot; and you may be cutting things a bit short in terms of trying to make a move into a new home right away. Whenever you buy before you sell you GIVE UP your power of control.

3. Plan a strategy to deal with the various contingencies that might arise so you have some backup plans. For example, the house does not sell right away but you need to move for work - do you go and leave the family behind? Does everyone go and the house remains vacant? Think about how long you can realistically afford to wait to sell before you either don't make the move or delay it (if that is an option), or you have to rent. Look at your monthly expenses and how much cash you have to hold you over.

4. Find out what your current employer (or new one) will or can do if the house does not sell. While some will  buy it themselves, this represents a significant financial burden, especially in this market, so they may not be willing to do this. If there is a relocation firm involved, find out if they purchase and then sell on their own. Be sure you find out what the price will be - this MAY NOT be to your advantage financially. Of course, if the house does not sell and renting is not an option, you may have no choice.

5. Investigate the rental market thoroughly, including asking your agent, so you know what your home could realistically bring in the rental market. This is critical in case you need to make a decision about renting or not. Understand and prepare for the difference between your rental income and your monthly expenses - will the rent cover your loan payment? 75%? Make sure you understand all the financial issues so you can make an informed decision if you need to.

6. Keep in mind that the rental market may also be soft; there is no guarantee that your home WILL rent right away at the price you want or need.

7. Consider what needs to be done if you go ahead and relocate but need to continue marketing your home. Your agent can handle this from afar but you will need to be involved.

8. Look into having someone to property manage you place after you leave. This may be more important if you rent, since your agent can, and should, watch out for your home while it is being marketed.

Here are a few thoughts on relocation packages, if you are fortunate enough to be offered one.

1. My best advice - make sure you CLEARLY understand all the details of the relocation package the company is offering and have it in writing. If it isn't in writing then it probably isn't binding. DO NOT rely on company promises that they will cover this item, or pay you X for that.

2. If you are getting a relocation package as part of a new job and this is part of your decision making process, it is even MORE critical to understand the details of the package so you can look out for your welfare and that of your family before accepting the job offer. You may want or need  to propose other changes in the package or negotiate further, if there is room to do so. Be aware that some companies are very rigid and do not negotiate terms, but others will, especially if you are in a higher level position. Just DON'T negotiate yourself out of a job (I've seen it happen as a Human Resources professional in my past life).

3. It is likely the Human Resources Department (if your company has one) will be involved so make sure you get ALL your questions answered and that you understand the implications of each portion of the package. Talk to your manager as well.

4. Ask if your firm is using a Relocation Company to handle the transaction (e.g., processing of invoices, handling of funds including reimbursements to you, sale of your current residence, purchase of a new residence). If so, find out who the contact person will be and make sure you talk to them and understand how the relocation process will work and who to call whenever there are problems (which WILL happen). Can you reach them in an emergency, at night or over the weekend? NOTE: Sometimes companies are not fully aware of the requirements that the Relocation Company has, and you may be told one thing by your company and another by the Relocation firm. Get everything clarified and in writing, especially any changes to the terms and conditions that are agreed on.

5. Examine the following in the package, if applicable (you may have other things offered to you as well that are not mentioned here, and not all of this will be part of a relocation package).

1. Who covers moving your household goods? Any limits? Who gets to choose the moving company  and what is the process? How many competitive bids do you need? Who signs off on the contract? What insurance coverage do you get (sometimes there are limits by the relocation company and/or van line, so if you want more coverage how is this to be handled and paid for? Will the move include your car (s); what about a boat? jet skis? RV? other large equipment? Can you drive a car versus having it shipped?
2. Are house hunting trips to your new location covered and what are the restrictions? How many times? How many days? Hotel and meals? Who can go - you, you and a spouse/partner; what about children?
3. Who makes the transportation and hotel arrangements (i.e., does the company use a vendor such as Carlson or do you make your own arrangements)? What are the daily limits for hotel rates and food? Do you have to stay at a particular hotel?
4. Is there a housing allowance to assist in the transition? If so, how much and what is this based on? Consider whether you are moving to a less expensive or more expensive city than where you live currently.
5. Will the company help in any way with the sale of your current residence, and if so how? What happens if your house does not sell? Will the company buy it? How does this impact your mortgage and value?
6. Will the company assist in the purchase of a new home as you transition (financially or otherwise). Can you select your own Realtor to help you find a new home? NOTE: If you are required to use the services of a Relocation Company, rather than it being optional, make sure you understand their role in the new home purchase - restrictions, timing, who you can use, the amount of the referral fee they might demand of the Realtor in your new location.
7. Will the company cover any housing costs in your new location before you move into your new home, if necessary? Limits? Requirements? How reimbursed and when? Is temporary housing available through the company or must you find your own rental? This can be particularly important if you leave your current home to start your new job and need to live in temporary housing and your family remains behind while your house is on the market. Will you have two sets of housing costs?

6. Make sure you understand the reimbursement process, requirements, and limitations. And it is critical to understand what will happen if you should leave the company voluntarily and if this will impact the relocation reimbursement. It is not uncommon for companies to require that you sign an agreement that you will owe the company part or all of the reimbursement if you should leave the company on your own within a period of time (e.g., 6 months or a year). And what, if anything, happens if you are fired or laid off? These details should be part of the original package, but if not ASK!

7. Review the details of the package with your accountant. There can be significant tax implications for certain aspects of relocation packages and money you may receive, particularly if it counts as 1040 income. While the IRS and your state DOR may allow deductions for different components of relocation (mileage, cost of moving goods, transportation, among other things), there ARE limits and restrictions. You NEED to understand what these are so you are not surprised at tax time. That great sounding package you are getting is NOT FREE and it CAN COST YOU. Find out from your company how they handle the monies that are given to you for the relocation, e.g., does this count as part of your 1040 income?

8. Receipts and records - I can't emphasize this enough. Keep the best possible records you can, in a separate folder and notebook. Track all mileage, especially if you drive to your new location or for a house hunting trip. Your company will require receipts and you will need them for tax purposes. Keep copies of any receipts you need to pass along to your company and/or the Relocation firm. Keep copies of any and all contracts and agreements or anything else that you sign.

9. If the relocation is very complex and financially lucrative, you might want to have your attorney review it as well. It does become a contractual arrangement between you and the company and you want to understand your legal rights.

As a Realtor who works with buyers who are relocating, it is important for me to know about your relocation package so I can better assist you. This is especially important if you must use a Relocation Company and there is a referral fee required, or if the firm requires that you use a certain brokerage.

I cannot advise you on the terms and conditions of your relocation package but I can assist with the house hunting process (helping you find a home, educating you on the market, providing neighborhood and community information, giving you resources so you can do your own due diligence).

Good luck!! Don't hesistate to contact me if I can help in any way with your move to sunny San Diego.

I wanted to take a moment to give you an overview of my relocation experience so you will understand my personal perspective on moving. Unlike lots of agents who help people with relocation, I have actually gone through it a number of times, both by choice and due to corporate jobs.

Most recently, my wife and I decided to make a lifestyle change (I was most in favor of moving to California and had been for years since I hate winter in Boston, which lasts about 6 months!). We spent almost a year talking, thinking, and exploring (good advice) before taking the plunge and moving to Carlsbad. We paid for our own movers, sold a house and a condo, closed the art gallery, and hit the road with 2 cats (more on issues associated with relocation and pets later), taking 7 days to drive 3400 miles. I will share some suggestions on house hunting from a distance, finding the right mover, planning your schedule and more in future posts.

The first big relocation was from Michigan, where I was working on my Ph.D., to Boston for my wife's new job. We had 2 very young children, our first house in Dearborn Heights, and planned to buy a new place in Boston (where prices were at least double). This was a move paid for by my wife's new company (more on working with corporate relocations later). The most difficult aspect was that my wife was in Boston in her new job and house hunting, while I remained in Michigan working fulltime, in graduate school fulltime, and with 2 daughters aged 2 and 3. This went on for a number of months with us able to get together just a few times (part of the relocation agreement with the company). We moved into an apartment in the Boston suburbs for a short period after we sold out MI home until we had closing on the house in Massachusetts. Talk about stress that year!

Next big relo (with a local move to a larger house in between) was to Minneapolis, again a job move with a new company. We had the opportunity to explore the possibility first with the company (great advice if you have the choice before you end up moving to a city that you DON'T want to be in). We were impressed with the Minneapolis area and made the move. The relocation package was different and, again, we were apart with my wife traveling weekly plus house hunting in Minnesota while I was in Boston working fulltime, taking care of the kids, and finishing the work on my Ph.D.  We bought a model home in Minnesota and moved but at the time could NOT sell the Boston house until much later (more on dealing with that issue) so we had 2 mortgages. With the kids growing up, schools were a bigger issue for us and here we found fabulous schools. A downside to the move to Minnesota (we were there 2 years), and something any family who relocates may experience, was that the kids not only changed schools when we moved, but because of living in 2 different homes while in Minnesota plus to school district changes, the girls were in 3 different schools in 2 years (a major issue for one daughter).

The first house was in Minneapolis and the second was in St. Paul, then an abrupt company close-down (no warning, just overnight) forced my wife to hunt for another job (fortunately I was working fulltime). Her new job allowed us to remain in Minnesota for a bit but with significant travel to the west coast, but ultimately we would be moving again. We almost ended up in California this time but my wife's business travel to San Francisco during the big earthquake nixed that decision!! The next decision was to return to Boston (another corporate relo with yet another package). We moved in the dead of winter which meant, with pets, some restrictions on when, or if, you can fly. Since it was 29 BELOW ZERO for 2 weeks while preparing to move, the airlines would not let us fly with pets (for safety reasons, as it gets too cold in the hold), so we ended up having to rent 2 cars (with 2 kids, 3 cats and personal stuff) and driving all night to Ohio to a family member's home, then flying from there to Boston since the temperatures were warmer. This time, given we could NOT sell our home in Minnesota and decided to rent it (oh, and by the way we were ALSO renting the first house since that did not sell when we moved to St. Paul due to the downturn in the market there at the time), we thought it made the most sense to rent a place in Boston for 6 months where we could have pets, and then house hunt (not a bad option if you can manage it and financially it makes sense - it did for us as it gave us time to sell both houses in Minnesota). Who wants to carry 3 mortgages?

There you have it. The BEST advice I can offer as a Realtor, in general, about relocation is to ALWAYS BE PREPARED TO MAKE A CHANGE IN YOUR PLANS and KEEP YOUR OPTIONS OPEN. You just never know when you might need to be flexible. Be ready to deal with lots of emotional stuff too, no matter how smoothly it goes. You are making a significant change here, and it WILL impact you - psychologically, emotionally and physically. Plus if you are married or with a partner, or have kids, IT WILL AFFECT THEM AS WELL.

Need to make a move by choice or job transfer? Check out my services for relocation buyers to see how I can help YOU! Thanks for  reading...and if you have a relocation story you would like to share, please do so.