"Dear Matt: I just got a shiny new computer and wanted to know what kind of contact management program I should get? I really want to get automated this year. What do you suggest?"

Dear Agent: I suggest you Stop Contact Management before it Starts!

Like some crazy rash, agents seem to need a "salve" for their contact management itch. Somehow, the theory goes, installing a whizz-bang-do-it-all software program is going to make their sales soar, as the software takes over "managing the contacts" from cradle to grave. Promises include an organzied calendar, a tidy task list and an automatic barrage of letters, emails and labels to your contacts - all designed to "manage" them into a sale.

YUK!

Let's get one thing straight: Computers don't make sales. People do. So the ONLY contact your computer needs to manage is YOU. You shouldn't use the technology to as a "surrogate sales person" that somehow reaches out across the web and magically transforms a stream of emails into a stream of dollars. That's just ridiculous. Every good sales person knows that you don't "manage" your prospects: actually, they manage you. But you DO need to build relationships with them - and that's the ONLY form of "management" that should be applied by the computer. And it should ONLY be applied to you.

If mass emails built sales, then we'd all be out of business; Amazon does a better job of drip-annoying us every day in our Inboxes. If they really drove real estate sales, then they'd already have been in this market, considering they sell so much more than books these days. Template letters, e-news templates, postcards, it's all just noise. Automatic property alerts say, "I don't really want to work with you until you're ready to pay, so in the meantime, my computer will babysit you." Really powerful stuff for building relationships - NOT.

Ok, to be fair, if you want to use the computer to manage yourself, then there are some tools - and you probably already own them - you could use. First, stick to Outlook. Run away from any program that's proprietary, involves a monthly fee, charges extra to "work" with your smartphone or email program and nails you for technical support. Outlook sits on your computer, you own it, with no monthly fees, and a lot of tech support is available online free. Even paying for "Exchange" hosting to make your Outlook available online and synch with your Blackberry won't cost half as much as most other programs. Oh, and did we mention that you MOSTLY already KNOW how to use Outlook? That's good, too. No weird functions or modalities to figure out by some third-party, twice-removed programming staff that really wishes they could be playing with a Linux box (don't ask).

To apply "personal" contact management, try using this really sophisticated tool in Outlook: The Follow Up Flag. Whooo. That's right - look at the screen. Focus. Focus. Stare at it. Aha! There's that little Flaggy-thingy on every email. Wonder what it does? Click it. Gently. Slowly. AHA! It's a way to set a "follow up reminder" for every email, call or appointment you conduct. You mean - gasp, shock, pant - if you're writing an email to someone, you can PRE-set a reminder for next week in the ACTUAL email and it will pop-up on your task list next week? WHOOOOOOO HOOOOOO!

Um, and that's all it takes. You build relationships by calling propsects, writing personal emails to clients and setting appointments with other agents to build networks. You "manage" those relationships by reminding yourself to keep doing them - every week, forever. And it costs nothing. Well, it costs the "right" amount, actually: person power. You, doing the things it takes, to build relationships, every week.

By following up.

That's contact management. It's an activity of ONE. Your database is for storing the numbers and email addresses of prospects. But the follow-ups and task lists aren't for them. They are for you.