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2007-10-31 18:02:00

Dear Coach: How Can I Overcome a Block About Calling My SOI?

Dear Coach:

My broker has suggested that I start working my Sphere as a way of helping me survive the slow market. Although I know it is a good idea, I always find other things to do instead of calling the people in my Sphere. I seem to have a block when it comes to this. What do you suggest?


Ms. Procrastination


Dear “Ms. Procrastination,”

As you point out, the real estate market has slowed down. Houses are on the market longer and most agents’ phones are ringing less often. Your broker’s suggestion that you personally connect with your Sphere of Influence is good advice since these people are the ones who will most likely use you for their own transactions, and refer you to someone they know. Unfortunately, most agents choose not to stay personally connected with their Sphere. Instead they keep sending out postcards and mailings to people they don’t know, rather than staying personally connected with the people they do know. While I don’t know your exact issue, here are some common reasons real estate agents don’t call (or meet) with their Sphere:

  1. FEAR – Many agents have fear about calling people they know. Some of these fears include: fear of failure, fear of success, fear of rejection, fear of having nothing important to say, and fear of offending someone. Fear is the number one reason more agents don’t call their past clients, and why they don’t get more business and referrals. In fact, many agents have less fear about calling strangers than calling the people they know.
  2. DISORGANIZATION – Agents who are disorganized don’t know who is in their Sphere or where to locate their phone numbers. They often have little yellow stickies all over their desk and computer monitor.
  3. TIME MANAGEMENT – One of the most common responses as to why agents have not called their Sphere is – “I didn’t have time.” The real answer is that they didn’t make time. They made calling their Sphere a low priority and sending mail (or doing anything else) a high priority.
  4. NOT KNOWING WHAT TO SAY – Another common reason agents don’t stay connected to their Sphere is that they simply do not know what to say. 
  5. PROJECTION – If we do not want to be called by people, then we project (and incorrectly assume) that others do not want to get a phone call from us. This reasoning keeps many agents stuck and prevents them from ever calling their Sphere of Influence.

So, which of these reasons rings true for you? And, what is it costing you? Identify what is getting in your way of calling your Sphere, then ask your broker, or Real Estate Coach, for help.

(Stuart Kaufman, MS, MBA, is a Real Estate Business Coach who specializes in helping real estate agents earn a six-figure income working 40 hours per week. He also specializes in helping real estate agents, who have teams, manage them more effectively and efficiently. Stuart resides in Washington State and is a regular contributor to numerous real estate publications nationwide. Got a question for the coach? Contact Stuart at or

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