A few months back I opted to shine up a facet of my real estate repetoire. With nearly a decade of experience assisting folks in the Chicago area buy and sell homes ranging from a toe nail north of six figures into the mid seven figures, I am comfortable negotiating contracts with my team at The Real Estate Lounge Chicago.

Across the board my clients, whether list side or sell side, have been pleased with my efforts. Steeped in the school of good reason and fairness I tend to integrate statistics into the process and apply good measures of my South Side Irish heritage - balancing charm, grace and pugnaciousness - to push forward my clients' agenda. The good-to-great relations I enjoy with my clients reflect that our efforts tend to yield positive results.

Anyway, turn the hands of our Chicago-oriented clock back a couple of months and there I was sitting in a Certified Negotiation Expert class. Sponsored by my top shelf brokerage, @properties, the session was two days long and rife with case studies, data, flow charts and graphics.  The good news is I was a model student enjoying the presentation and information as much as my son Jackson enjoys a taste of chocolate or a piece of candy. And while I can't say that I learned anything new I can earnestly express my gratitude for the reminders brought to the table.

For my efforts I received a nifty three-letter designation to tag on my business card - CNE.

One might ask does the class or the acronym make me any smarter? Probably not. But the acronym AND the sheer volume of experience adds up to what I call a "tends to."

And what exactly is a "tends to"? A "tends to" is this - education/information (reflected by the acronym) augmented by experience "tends to" make your life a heckuva lot easier when you are participating in the Chicago real estate market (or wherever you are buying a home).

But I will grant you this - while negotiating skills can be enhanced through coursework or practice, there are some folks who are natural born negotiators.

To make my point I simply consider my three-and-half-year-old son Jackson.

Right before he turned three Jackson hit the ground running as far as expanding his vocabulary and manifesting his expressiveness. This loquaciousness simply amplifies his negotiating skills. And whether it's early in the morning when he would make the case for a candy for the ride to Lycee Francaise, his pre-pre-school, or late at night coming home from Target or wherever and he would insert the good reason for a cartoon when we got home, Jackson is what I perceive as a born natural negotiator.

It never ceases to amaze me. Even last night following a rugged day of a microburst storm leaving us without power most of the day after bruised skies unleashed savage winds that literally shredded the tops of dozens of trees surrounding our Edgewater home. After regaining a degree of normalcy in our lovely brick home we headed out to Oak Park for dinner with my brother and his family to celebrate his son Colin's birthday.

No sooner had we finished desert at Fuego Loco and gotten Jackson and Lucas into their "cowmouglage" carseats than old Jaybird piped up, "Can I have just one cartoon when we get home?" Long meal, longer day, and like any battle-tested negotiator he zooms in on his desired outcome and doesn't flinch in making his case.

Identifying the goal may be the chief element in the negotiator's toolkit. But a close second is being able to communicate the desired goal. And while some crafty types may try to use sleights of hand or what Elvis Costello so graciously referred to as "verbal gymnastics," the true negotiator is just that - true.

Identify what you want, let the other side know that you want it, explain to the other side why what you want makes good sense, move forward.

Do people complicate it? All the time. I've witnessed it. I've received offers and responses to my clients' offers that have puzzled me and left me shaking my head.

But at the end of the day good reason tends to prevail. And when all is said and done we hear the good reason of Jackson's request and then we watch cartoons.

By the way, Happy Father's Day.